I haven't written here in a while, because I wasn't sure that I had anything worth saying. Well, the truth is that I felt that I had run out of words. Everyone else on the internet has so much to say, that I felt it was okay to simply be quiet, and that's what I did. I will write here when I have something to say, otherwise I'll just be still. Oh, how could I forget about feeling overwhelmed by life with four kids with a high school graduate, and a one year old as bookends.
So at some point in the last year I had to admit to myself that forty cometh. When I was younger (like last year) I was terrified. I thought some horrible thing happened at forty that was horrific. I mean I have heard stories of hormones gone crazy, the body becoming disobedient to the will of it's owner.
When someone said they could not believe that I was the mother of an eighteen year old; that made me feel so good. Unfortunately then they said they thought I was thirty. My goodness! Can you say panic attack? It was just last week that someone assumed I was a teenager. Help! I must get more rest. So I'm trying exercise, diet, and prayer.
|The 'I'm almost 40 and must beat my body into submission' dinner|
I'll be forty in five months and though I may not look like a teenager, I feel pretty good. I am starting to see old age as the blessing that it is, and not a curse. I pray that God blesses me with many more years, but I also want to learn to live in the moment of each and every day.
I am learning to embrace this new "adult" body that has given birth to four live humans, and has housed my soul for all these many years. I'm thanking God for the years, and the days, and the moments, which are gifts that ought not be squandered.
So have there been moments when I've felt that I would just lose my mind?
What did I do about it?
Pray and phone a friend who has been there.
Life isn't easy at any age, but the blessing is in seeing each day as the gift it is, no matter what age you are.
Peace and Blessings,